Sunday, December 16, 2012

We Have a New Year's Resolution For You!


Hello, holidays. Farewell, free time.

My sister Rose is going to make this short-ish and sweet in honor of what little time we have to spare, and what love we have for the treats that bring back decades of wonderful holiday memories. 

Today she's going to talk about vodka: Clear, odorless, and essential...to baking!

Really! Christopher Kimball of Cooks Illustrated has paid his staff plenty to work on the 'foolproof pie crust.' They have published many recipes over the years, all of which say 'perfect pie crust' in some way, shape or form. But only one contains the secret, discovered by one of his bakers, to a flaky crust no-matter how little attention you pay or how much you overwork your dough--namely, using vodka instead of water.

Why vodka?

Well, they explain, vodka is mostly alcohol, and that inhibits the development of gluten in the dough (a process by which the crust becomes less and less flaky, more and more rock-biscuit, by the moment). Use vodka, and the crust comes out flaky no matter the temperature of your room, the extent of your overworking the dough, your lack of lard. If you visit their free web site, the Cooks Illustrated team will explain all this to you for free.

The alcohol cooks off anyway, and it is completely flavorless. Enough said. Use vodka.

"But that only uses a couple tablespoons per recipe!"  "Why would I buy a big bottle of vodka to keep around for pie crust? I hate vodka. Can't stomach the stuff."  

Well, shall we say, you can't stomach it straight. I am willing to bet you do stomach it happily whenever you use vanilla! That's right, when you buy that fabulous Penzeys vanilla, 35% alcohol, you are essentially buying low-grade vodka infused with vanilla beans. And at what cost? In an earlier post, we learned how to get the best yogurt at half the price by using a crock-pot to make our yogurt for us. Turns out, Vodka makes vanilla for you! 

Rose's Vanilla Recipe

Ingredients

1 750 ml bottle of vodka, any brand
6 vanilla beans, 3 cut in half the long way (the other 3 left whole)

Directions

Buy a bottle of vodka. Put vanilla beans into the bottle. Shake it periodically for 6 months. 

Voila, you have gourmet vanilla, for a quarter of the price. You can double the beans and get double-strength. (That's the secret.) 

Keep adding new vodka to the existing bottle as you use the stuff you have, and you can keep a full bottle of double-strength vanilla going for 2 years or more.

Do not adjust your screens. That is all there is to real Madagascar vanilla!  For 15 vanilla beans you pay around $37. That's also about what you pay for one 8 oz double-strength bottle of vanilla--in essence, one-quarter of the amount you will be making. You can also buy vanilla beans at Whole Foods, or Stop n Shop, or wherever else you usually shop.

Then pick your vodka. I got a 750ml bottle of Rain Organic Vodka for $15.99. So, for the 12 vanilla beans I used for this recipe (I made mine double-strength), plus the vodka, I spent less than half what I would spend on double-strength Penzeys vanilla, and it's self renewing -- with the periodic addition of another $15 bottle of vodka, I wind up paying even less per ounce!

It won't be ready for THIS holiday season, but now you have an easy New Year's Resolution so you don't look like a jerk when people ask you if you have one and then you have to tell them that you don't do that kind of thing, you don't make resolutions when you just do what you need to do, whether it's New Year's or any other time of the year!!!&#$%!

Yes, simply make a resolution and buy those beans today, and you will have your own stash for holiday seasons to come.

[If you plan to make some home-made fruit sorbet in the meantime, use a tablespoon or two of vodka to help keep it from freezing into a solid block as it sits in the freezer.]

While you are waiting around for your vanilla to hatch, 
Use Myers's Rum instead and you will be surprised how much you love that Banana Bread, Pumpkin Bread, Carrot cake -- you name it. Especially, if you use Sucanat (SUgar CAne NATural) instead of refined sugar, you will find your baked goods taking on a most delicious caramelized flavor. It is equally great in cookies. 

And, add 3 or 4 tablespoons of said rum to a carton of Organic Valley Egg Nog, shake it and pour the carton into your ice cream maker. Let it run till it stops turning (30+ minutes). Then write to tell me how you much you LOVE your Egg Nog ice cream!

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